Should a Man Hire a Male or Female Divorce Attorney? Male Vs Female-What Matters Most

Divorce is a stressful and emotional process that requires legal guidance and representation.

Many men who are facing divorce may wonder if they should hire a male or female divorce attorney, and whether the gender of their lawyer will affect the outcome of their case.

Divorce lawyer
Divorce lawyer from a court | PEOPLE

In this article, we will explore some of the factors that may influence this decision, and provide some tips on how to choose the best divorce attorney for your situation.

Does Gender Matter in Divorce Cases?

Some people may have the impression that having a divorce attorney of a certain gender will give them an advantage in court or in settlement negotiations.

For example, some men may think that having a female attorney will make them appear more sympathetic, especially regarding custody and parenting time issues.

On the other hand, some women may believe that having a male attorney will be more aggressive and fight harder for them, especially if they feel they have been taken advantage of in their marriage.

However, these assumptions are based on gender stereotypes that may not reflect the reality of divorce cases.

In fact, the gender of your attorney may not matter at all to the judge who presides over your case, or to the other party’s attorney who negotiates with your lawyer.

What matters more is the personality, experience, professionalism, and ethics of your attorney, regardless of their sex.

Moreover, most divorce cases are settled out of court, which means that the gender of your attorney may not have any impact on the outcome of the negotiations.

As Divorce Lawyer News, an online resource for divorce information, states, “Relying on gender stereotypes like thinking that a male lawyer would fight harder for you, and a female lawyer would be a stronger communicator, can be right – at times.

However, what’s really important would be their experience and their attitude towards you and your case – not their gender.”

What Factors Should You Consider When Choosing a Divorce Attorney?

Since the gender of your attorney may not make a difference in your divorce case, what factors should you consider when choosing a divorce attorney?

A divorcing wife asking an attorney questions
Asking attorney questions [PHOTO COURTESY OFWORTHY’S BLOG]
Here are some of the most important ones:


You want an attorney who has handled many divorce cases similar to yours, and who knows the laws and procedures of your jurisdiction.

You also want an attorney who has a good reputation with other attorneys and judges in your area.


You want an attorney who listens to your needs and goals, explains your options and rights clearly, keeps you informed of the progress of your case, and responds to your questions and concerns promptly.


You want an attorney who you feel comfortable with, who understands your situation and emotions, who respects your decisions and preferences, and who works well with you as a team.


You want an attorney who charges reasonable fees for their services, provides you with an estimate of the total cost of your case upfront, and explains how they bill for their time and expenses.

How to Find the Best Divorce Attorney for You?

Finding the best divorce attorney for you may take some time and research. Here are some steps you can take to narrow down your options:

Ask for referrals

You can ask your friends, family members, co-workers, or other professionals who have gone through divorce or know someone who has for recommendations of good divorce attorneys.

You can also check online reviews and ratings of local attorneys on websites like [Avvo] or [].

Do some background checks

You can verify the credentials and qualifications of potential attorneys by checking their websites, online profiles, or state bar associations.

You can also look for any disciplinary actions or complaints against them on websites like [ABA Lawyer Referral Directory] or [Martindale-Hubbell].

Schedule consultations

You can contact several attorneys who meet your criteria and schedule initial consultations with them.

Most attorneys offer free or low-cost consultations where you can discuss your case and ask them questions about their experience, approach, fees, etc.

You can also observe how they communicate with you and how they make you feel.



The gender of your divorce attorney may not matter as much as you think. What matters more is their personality, experience, professionalism, and ethics.

You should choose an attorney who has handled many divorce cases similar to yours, who communicates well with you, who you feel comfortable with, and who charges reasonable fees.

You can find the best divorce attorney for you by asking for referrals, doing some background checks, scheduling consultations, and comparing and choosing.

Remember, your divorce attorney is your guide and advocate through a difficult and complex process, so make sure you choose wisely.


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